Up Front 03/03

“Old Toady”, a man with a very pronounced cold explained to me in a shop recently, “should be applauded for bringing the country together!” A vision of a character from Wind in the Willows morphed quickly into the face of the Prime Minister, when the man went on to explain: “Just when you thought he could do no good, he infuriates so many people that they all join hands and march through the capital. Nationalities joined together; races and creeds walked arm in arm; and even that classic scourge of middle England, the feuding family, put their bickering and petty jealousies aside to stand and be counted.” He paused to be sure I was concentrating, and then carried on with his piece d’ resistance. “Millions walked the streets and loudly declared their Prime Minister to be a dictatorial git! Amazing what one man can do when he really puts his mind to it!” He went on to explain his theory that the man (whom he admitted he had voted for) was now aligning himself with leaders who had a history of rule bending to get their own way. “And they all have last names beginning with B!” he exclaimed. “Right and wrong is now irrelevant, they’ve even taken religion out of the equation by claiming that their moral high ground is above that of most church leaders!” As he paid for his bread and shuffled out of the shop muttering “…Bush, Blair Berlusconi…baffling… absolutely baffling,” I couldn’t help wondering who on earth any of us could vote for – if voting is allowed – in future elections.